A Dream Comes True

On Tuesday, September 11^th 2007, I blogged about "Taize worship” experience I had in my college. I wrote that I was hoping to do my field education in Taize and was looking for sponsors. You can read my posting here. Guess what? I just came back from Taize two weeks ago! I did stay in Taize community for one month and do my field education there. It was a really wonderful experience! I had rich spiritual experiences. I will blog about this next time. Meeting new friends from different parts of the world was also a very invaluable experience. It was incredible to see how I was able to be close to two Europeans and one Filipino only within a short time! Even one of my French friends invited me and my other Asian friends to stay in her flat when we visited Paris. And we did go to Paris for two nights staying in her flat, enjoying good French dishes and wine, and having a French cooking lesson. :) I also enjoyed and learned from the Taize brothers’ hospitality and sincere care. Their lives were really inspiring! In short, my Taize trip was really an unforgettable experience! So, I would like to dedicate this posting to those whom God had used to make my Taize trip did come true. Million thanks to my dear lecturers and friends who are very supportive: AP (PhD Cand.), Rev.Dr.SEW, and Dr.LSH. I also thank God for some people, who went to Taize before, who joyfully sponsor me to go to Taize. You all are God’s angels!

I Am Just Wondering

The title of this song is: Allah Peduli (God Cares).
Here is the free translation of the lyric.

There are many things which I cannot understand
Why such things must happen in this life
One thing I keep in my heart:
God always cares whatever may happen

God understands
God cares about all problems we are facing
He will never leave us struggling alone
Because God understands

I often sing this song whenever I feel down. And I've just sung it before I decided to blog. But, something was different today. I sang it with my mouth while my heart was rejecting what came out from my mouth. My heart shouted: Does God really care? Does God really understand what I am facing now? If God does, why does he keep silent??? I can add many more 'why' questions if I want to. I am just wondering: why???

Lord, grant me faith so that I'm able to sing this song from my heart...

Merry Christmas!

On the fourth week of advent, a preacher mentioned in his preaching, “I am sure God is very proud of his people in Indonesia. Why? Because we still can celebrate Christmas despite all the calamities we all experience in Indonesia. We give our best to celebrate Jesus’ birth. For example, our church’s budget for Christmas celebration is 45 millions rupiah (around US$ 4,500. In Indonesia, we can have a simple meal with rice, meat, vegetables, and drink for US$ 1). It is not a small amount of money. There are hundreds churches in Indonesia. Can you imagine how much Christians are willing to spend for celebrating Christmas? It must be billions! This is incredible!”

I heard the preacher saying this in a worship service in a quite big church. He obviously thinks that one of the reasons which makes Christmas celebrations incredible and blessed is because Christians are willing to spend so much money despite the calamities in Indonesia. I think in a totally different way. In my opinion, the big amount of money spent for the Christmas celebrations or the willingness to spend so much money do not make God proud of Christians at all. Amos 5:21-24 confirms this, “I hate, I despise your feasts, and I take no delight in your solemn assemblies. Even though you offer me your burnt offerings and grain offerings, I will not accept them; and the peace offerings of your fattened animals, I will not look upon them. Take away from me the noise of your songs; to the melody of your harps I will not listen. But let justice roll down like waters, and righteousness like an ever-flowing stream.”

Christmas is not merely a celebration. It is mainly about giving. As God has given his Best to incarnate in the first Christmas in order to save us, Christmas should always remind us to give our best to serve others, to pass God’s love on to people in need. In Indonesia context this year, I think it is not appropriate to have a huge Christmas celebration. It is even better if Christians do not celebrate Christmas at all. Or may be it is more accurate to say that Christians should celebrate Christmas in a different way. US$ 4,500, the approximate amount I assume one church allocate for Christmas celebration, can feed 4.500 flood refugees for one simple meal! Can you imagine how many refugees can the churches in Indonesia feed? Unfortunately, there is just a small group of churches which has this sense of crisis.

There was a UN Conference for Climate Change in Bali recently. To my shame, Indonesia is “awarded” the fastest forest destroyer. I think the Indonesian churches also indirectly contribute to the destruction of the forests by cutting pine trees for Christmas trees. Why do we need to cut so many trees for a one-day-celebration and worsen the global warming? Without any Christmas trees, Christmas is still a Christmas. Without any celebrations, Christmas is still a Christmas. But without caring for those who are in need, Christmas is not a Christmas. Without showing any concerns to what is happening in the world and doing something to make the world a better place, Christmas is not a Christmas. Again, Christmas is all about giving. Merry Christmas! May our Christmas celebrations be blessed and be a blessing, not a curse, to others!

A Thought from Asian Idol

Last night the first Asian Idol was chosen by voting. It was one of the worst nights in my life! Well, as said by a sister, I was very enthusiastic (probably too enthusiastic according to her ^_^) about this event because I was a music maniac! To my (to all the judges’ also, I am sure!!!) surprise, the unexpected winner was chosen! Sigh…

For Hady Mirza’s fans, I am sorry to say that he doesn’t deserve to be the first Asian Idol. A sister of mine from Singapore, where Mirza is from, also admits it. If we really consider their singing and entertaining ability, only three persons deserve to be the one: Mike (Indonesia), Mau (Philippines), and Jaclyn (Malaysia). After the show ended, I messaged my girlfriend and that sister to express my disappointment. That sister’s reply was this: “Again it’s a generation that focuses on the looks lah…” She was right! I also told her that most of the voters must be girls and only consider Mirza’s appearance.

Well, yes, but I think it is not just this generation which focuses on the looks. This is human’s tendency for all time. We do not only judge others by their appearances, but also value ourselves based on what is outside. We tend to care only about our outward appearances, not what is deep inside our hearts. When we do good deeds for others, what does actually drive us? Is it love or a hidden agenda or what? When we do our “spiritual activities”, what is our motive? Are we sincere? Or we just want to feel and look good?

“Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.” Proverbs 4:23

God Does Not Always Answer Our Prayers?

“God does not always answer our prayers.” Almost all speakers I have heard talking about prayer do state this. It has always been troubling me. I find two problems here. Firstly, this statement implies that prayer is all about asking and answering. We ask something from God and God answers. It seems that God is regarded as a genie that always provides whatever the person who controls it asks. This is not the essence of prayer, at least for Christianity. Asking for something is only a small part of prayer dimensions. In fact, it is the shallowest understanding of prayer. The heart of prayer is to commune with God. Exchanging our feeling and thoughts with God. To go into the very heart of God, this is the heart of prayer.

Secondly, I find the understanding is based on the presupposition that answering prayers equals answering ‘yes’. It means when God says ‘no’ to our requests, we neglect his answer and act as if God has not answered our prayers. This is very childish. Children usually cannot accept a ‘no’ answer from their parents. They will conclude quickly that their parents do not love them if their requests are not granted. As they grow, they would understand that their parents have actually ‘a better answer’ when they say ‘no’ to their children. Most of the time, I find that when I think God does not answer my request, he has actually answered ‘no’. I just cannot accept it. So, God always answers our prayers, more accurately our requests. His answer is either ‘yes’ or ‘no’.

Thank You Mr.Smiley !!!

On November 12^th, I went to Malacca to visit someone in one of the hospitals there. While I was waiting for my bus in the bus stop just opposite my college, a skinny and smiley guy came and asked, “Do you know how to go to Malaysia?” Then I told him that I wanted to go to Malaysia, but since I had never been there, I was also not sure. Then he was very happy because he found another “blind man” to go together with him.

He was very friendly. He told me that he lived in a condo nearby. Later he found out that I was a theological student and I discovered that he was a Sunday school teacher. We were really enjoying our chat while we were on the bus going to Johor Baru. Then he started to share that he had a cancer and just done chemotherapy. He was going to go through radiotherapy soon. I almost could not believe it. Because he looked so happy! How could someone whose stomach had been removed be joyful like that? At the end I found the secret. He said, “We don’t know when our lives will end. What we can do is to choose how we want to live. And I have chosen to live happily, enjoying whatever God has given to me. God is good all the time.”

Of course it was not the first time I heard such statement. But, being said by a man who had gone through such agony, that statement became extremely powerful! He is the man who really understands what Proverbs 17:22 says, “A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.” He has taught me a very meaningful lesson which I might never learn even from a prominent theologian! He also has reminded me of two things. Firstly, a message will be powerful if it is said by a person who really knows what it means by experiencing it. “God is good” might mean nothing if it is said by a person who has never gone through agonies in life. Secondly, a theology must be born from “the street”, not from an ivory tower. Being a theological student, sometimes I feel like being separated from the world. There are too many books which I have not read. Sometimes, or may be most of the times, this makes me forget that I also need to learn from the living text, such as the smiley man I met. In fact, I do believe that a good theology must be born from a dialectical process between the Word and the world. Having said this, I think that smiley man is the right person to write about and develop a theology of suffering.

At the end of our meeting, I said to him that I was very blessed to meet him. I truly thanked God for giving me the opportunity to meet and learn from him. And I really thanked him for his passion and openness to share his life with me. Thank you Mr. Smiley!!!

If Heaven and Hell Never Exist

Chrisye, an Indonesian pop singer legend who died on March 30^th 2007, composed a very interesting song entitled Jika Surga dan Neraka Tak Pernah Ada (If Heaven and Hell Never Exist). Here is the lyric:

Apakah kita semua benar-benar tulus menyembah pada-Nya?
(Are we truly sincere in worshipping Him?)

Atau mungkin kita hanya takut pada neraka dan inginkan surga?
(Or probably, are we just afraid of hell? And we simply want heaven?)

Jika surga dan neraka tak pernah ada, masihkah kau bersujud kepada-Nya?
(If heaven and hell never exist, will you still worship Him?)

Jika surga dan neraka tak pernah ada, masihkah kau menyebut nama-Nya?
(If heaven and hell never exist, will you still call His name?)

Bisakah kita semua benar-benar sujud sepenuh hati
kar'na sungguh memang Dia, memang pantas disembah, memang pantas dipuja?
(Can we truly worship Him ultimately because of He himself deserves to be worshipped and to be praised?)

This song challenges everyone who claims that they believe in God. Why do you believe in God? Why do you go to church, mosque, temple, or other worship places? Is it simply because you want to go to heaven and are afraid of going to hell? If this were the reason, you are actually not worshipping God. You are worshipping yourself. You are just using God for your own goodness and safety. You are basically worshiping Him because of what He can give to you.

Christianity never teaches this kind of egoistic faith. You may want to check the Bible to find out that whenever the writers of the Bible are referring to Jesus, they always mention Him as “Lord and Savior”, not “Savior and Lord”. Why? I think it is because they are trying to tell the readers that what Jesus has done is a secondary reason of why we should believe in and follow Him. The most important thing is who Jesus is. Jesus is Lord! If he is the Lord, he deserves to be worshipped! If God is truly God, God deserves to be worshipped! We do not need other reasons in order to believe in Him.

Karl Marx said, “Religion is the opium of the people.” I partly agree with him. I would say that religion MIGHT BECOME the opium of the people. It happens when people worship God only because of what God can do for them. For those who claim that you believe in God, let me challenge you to think: Why do you believe in God?