Exegesis & Spirituality

"The ultimate aim of all true exegesis is spirituality.
Only when exegesis is so understood
has the exegetical task been done in a way
that is faithful to the intent of the text itself."
Gordon D. Fee

Theology & Prayer

"If you are a theologian, you pray truly;
if you pray truly, you are a theologian."
Evagrius (One of the Greek Fathers, AD 346-399)

In Case You Want to Know

I was tagged by Layad to do this post. It was good to relieve some stress.

I am: not feeling so well today.
I think: it is going to rain soon. It is already dark.
I know: God is the only One whom I can depend on.
I have: a pet turtle. His name is Don.
I wish: I could always be sensitive to God’s voice and always be obedient.
I hate: myself whenever what I say is inconsistent with what I do.
I miss: Taize a lot. It is a wonderful place. You must go!
I fear: living my own lives without paying attention to what God wants me to do.
I hear: the birds are singing in the forest.
I smell: the aromateraphy from my air purifier. This smell is supposed to be good for hypertension. ^_^
I crave: for my mom’s cooking. Yum yum!
I search: for truth.
I wonder: if I can finish all my papers.
I regret: not having learned philosophy earlier.
I love: enjoying nature.
I ache: for a true holiday, not a fake one like now.
I am not: perfect.
I believe: God so loves the world that He gives His only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him may not perish but may have eternal life.
I dance: when I do not have any other choice.
I sing: when I am showering.
I cry: when I feel my burden is too heavy for me.
I fight: when I think I need to.
I win: when I choose to obey God.
I lose: when I choose not to obey God.
I never: think that I can study in Singapore and have a lot of friends from different countries. Such a blessing!
I (am) always: amazed by God’s love.
I confuse: myself whenever I observe my think-too-much-istic tradition. ^_^
I (am) listen(ing): to Taize songs.
I am scared: of not following God’s will in my life.
I need: to finish all my papers as soon as possible.
I am happy about: today’s weather. It is cooling.
I imagine: I meet Jesus face to face and He hugs me.

A Regret

I just said something hurtful to someone without being aware that it would be hurtful. I recalled an illustration given by one of my classmates during my homiletics class. She illustrated that we needed to be careful with what we said by using a tube of toothpaste. Once we pressed the tube, the toothpaste would come out, and there was no way to put it back inside the tube. My hurtful words had come out from my mouth. And there was no way to put it back inside my mouth. There was only a regret.

“Do you see a man who is hasty in his words?
There is more hope for a fool than for him.”
Proverbs 29:20

It's All about You

13 June 2008, Taize Community, France.

What a terrible morning! I did something which made me realize once more how evil and sinful I was. Why me, Lord? Why do You want to use a wretch like me to do Your works here on earth? It is too often that I say I want to serve You faithfully to the end, but You know that my life does not always reflect that I do mean it.

It was my second last day in the silence week. As usual, after the morning prayer, I had my breakfast in silence then I went to my room to take my little notebook for the morning devotion led by a Taize brother. Waiting for him to come, I decided to sit on a place, which I had never sat on before, outside the house which would be used for the morning devotion. I felt very sad as I recalled my terrible morning. Suddenly I looked at the blue sky on my left side and I saw two jet planes. One was flying horizontally and the other vertically. Unbelievable! They made a cross sign! I heard God saying, “My son, I love you for just as you are. I have called you not because of your merits. It is simply because I love you. The cross is the proof of my love for you. It is not about you. It is about Me.” I wept. Thank you, Lord. Yes, it’s all about You indeed.

A Dream Comes True

On Tuesday, September 11^th 2007, I blogged about "Taize worship” experience I had in my college. I wrote that I was hoping to do my field education in Taize and was looking for sponsors. You can read my posting here. Guess what? I just came back from Taize two weeks ago! I did stay in Taize community for one month and do my field education there. It was a really wonderful experience! I had rich spiritual experiences. I will blog about this next time. Meeting new friends from different parts of the world was also a very invaluable experience. It was incredible to see how I was able to be close to two Europeans and one Filipino only within a short time! Even one of my French friends invited me and my other Asian friends to stay in her flat when we visited Paris. And we did go to Paris for two nights staying in her flat, enjoying good French dishes and wine, and having a French cooking lesson. :) I also enjoyed and learned from the Taize brothers’ hospitality and sincere care. Their lives were really inspiring! In short, my Taize trip was really an unforgettable experience! So, I would like to dedicate this posting to those whom God had used to make my Taize trip did come true. Million thanks to my dear lecturers and friends who are very supportive: AP (PhD Cand.), Rev.Dr.SEW, and Dr.LSH. I also thank God for some people, who went to Taize before, who joyfully sponsor me to go to Taize. You all are God’s angels!

I Am Just Wondering

The title of this song is: Allah Peduli (God Cares).
Here is the free translation of the lyric.

There are many things which I cannot understand
Why such things must happen in this life
One thing I keep in my heart:
God always cares whatever may happen

God understands
God cares about all problems we are facing
He will never leave us struggling alone
Because God understands

I often sing this song whenever I feel down. And I've just sung it before I decided to blog. But, something was different today. I sang it with my mouth while my heart was rejecting what came out from my mouth. My heart shouted: Does God really care? Does God really understand what I am facing now? If God does, why does he keep silent??? I can add many more 'why' questions if I want to. I am just wondering: why???

Lord, grant me faith so that I'm able to sing this song from my heart...